We just finished season two of Beef. Go watch it, so good. The cast was fab. Such clever writing & a fascinating look at what it means to be human when all of our wounds, fears, desires & defenses start colliding.
The Carey/Oscar combo has me running to rewatch one of my favorite movies, Drive. They are both in it. <3
Also...the wardrobe. If the aesthetic is right, I can enjoy a show based on that alone. I was really into Carey Mulligan's effortless style. There was one dress in particular that I immediately went hunting for. And Oscar Isaac's silver koi fish pendant or Carey’s Spiral necklace? My Pisces soul is obsessed.
It def has some wtf crawl in your skin moments, a little campy, a little vile. If you have an uneasy stomach, here is your warning.
Every interaction felt like two histories colliding. Every character was reacting to each other, but they were also reacting to old wounds, expectations, ambition, shame, grief, status & the desperate need to be seen.
Underneath all of the chaos, it was such a human story. Of course, I found myself thinking & nodding throughout because it really is such a good example of something I find endlessly fascinating:
Our mind is an incredible storyteller.
Sometimes it tells stories that set us free. Sometimes it tells stories that imprison us.
All it takes sometimes is a moment, a feeling, a look, a silence & immediately our mind begins building a world around it. How much of our suffering comes from what actually happens to us...& how much comes from the meaning we attach to what happens?
Someone doesn’t respond the way we hoped & the story begins.
This person doesn’t respect me.
I’m failing.
I’m not enough.
I need to prove myself.
I need them to see me.
& before we even realize it, we are no longer responding to the now moment. We are responding to a story written from every hurt, fear, belief & experience we have carried with us.
The mind replays what the heart wants to heal.
We don’t just experience life. We interpret it & we give it meaning. We build narratives & sometimes those narratives help us survive. The story that once protected us becomes the very thing keeping us stuck. Our brains are constantly trying to make meaning. It is one of the most beautiful & complicated parts of being human.
Our brains dislike uncertainty. They would rather invent an explanation than sit in the discomfort of not knowing. It's one of the ways we make sense of life. But sometimes the story that once protected us becomes the cage we live in.
We start building invisible cages…
If I am kind, they will like me.
If I am easy-going, people will like me.
If I can keep everyone happy, I will be lovable.
If I achieve this goal, I will finally be loved.
I may never rest, but I will be loved.
If I don’t take up too much space, I will be safe.
Safe & small right here...
We build these stories so early that we forget they are stories at all.
They just become the lens we look through.
When we start to notice the story, we begin to create space.
This is why movement continues to feel like such a powerful practice to me. The body is where we can interrupt the loop. If we take time to breathe, move differently & slow down enough to actually feel ourselves, we create a tiny opening between stimulus & response.
We start to remember that we are not every thought we think. We are not every feeling we feel. A feeling can move through us. With our awareness, we can experience what is moving through us without becoming it.
We are the awareness witnessing it.
The story, the feeling, the thought.
All moving through us.
xP